Karlee Rae

-St. Paul, MN-

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Forest of Light | Source | Cube Breaker | Follow
  • For the record, some of these are paraphrased because I can't recite a lifetime of rudeness verbatim.
  • 2nd Grade
  • Teacher: What's your favorite food?
  • Me: Mahi mahi!
  • Teacher: There's no such thing, stop making things up.
  • Me: It's a type of dolphin fish.
  • Teacher: Don't go telling people you eat dolphins!!!
  • 2nd Grade
  • Student: [reading box of crayons] What does 'non toxic' mean?
  • Me: Well if a baby ate it, it means it wouldn't make them sick.
  • Student: *Tells teacher what I said*
  • Teacher: Don't tell kids that babies can eat crayons!!! CRAYONS ARE NOT BABY FOOD!
  • 3rd Grade
  • Me: *Playing cherry bomb with friends at recess. All those "friends" decided to ditch me. I had my eyes closed and hit my head on one of those steering wheels they put on playgrounds for some reason. I sit down crying*
  • Teacher's aid: Go cry somewhere else!
  • Freshman year
  • Me: Hey, would you fill out a recommendation form for me to join Colorguard?
  • Teacher: Sure!
  • Me: *Not supposed to open paper, but it was just folded and stapled so I could squeeze it open and see*
  • Teacher's comment: Karlee misses school a lot and so she is unreliable.
  • ****I'm disabled**** I missed quite a bit of school, but anyone can vouch for the fact that I ALWAYS knew my part.
  • Sophomore year
  • Teacher: We will be singing The Circle of Life for our next concert
  • Student: Oh! We should somehow figure out what the words are! BLAAAAH SINOBAYAAHHH HABBA SEEBEEE BLAHBLAHHH!!! Hahahahahaha!
  • Me: *Raises hand* Well, I actually already know the words they sing there! It goes Nants ingonyama bagithi baba, Sithi uhhmm ingonyama.
  • Teacher: How do you know what the words are?
  • Me: Well, when I was a kid, I used to listen to the Lion King broadway soundtrack every night, and I had the lyric book, so I learned all the words.
  • Teacher: *looks away from me, towards class* WOW, OBSESSED MUCH?!?"
  • Junior year
  • Teacher: Ok boys, all of you come up to this desk. One of you wrote this and didn't put your name on it.
  • Boys: No this doesn't belong to any of us.
  • Me: I didn't get mine back, can I see it? *Walks up to desk* Oh, this is mine....
  • Teacher: Wow...You have extremely manly handwriting.
  • Junior year
  • Teacher: Everyone who has their homework from yesterday, please put it on my desk. If you did not do the homework, you need to go sit in the hallway.
  • Me: But I was sick yesterday, I didn't even receive the homework, I couldn't have possibly done it.
  • Teacher: I don't care, you have to go outside, we're watching a video today.
  • Senior year
  • Teacher: *walks up to my desk and picks up my Rockstar*
  • Me: Don't shake that....
  • Teacher: Well now that you told me that, I have to do it!
  • Me: ............
  • Teacher: *Shook my drink and exploded my Rockstar all over himself in front of the whole class and at least offered to buy me one the next day*
  • Me: See? I told you not to do that...
  • [This was a teacher I really liked actually]
  • Me: *I was in the ICU while I was supposed to be at a choir concert. My blood pressure dropped so low, we were afraid I was going to die*
  • Teacher: It doesn't matter what excuse you have, if you miss a concert, you go down one letter grade.
  • College
  • Me: sang classical aria for class
  • Teacher: *in front of the class* You sound kermit-y.
  • Teacher: *Then directs me to get a paper towel to grab my tongue, and sing the song again while holding my tongue out, again, in front of the whole class* The paper towel got painfully stuck to my tongue and I had to rip it off. The class was watching me, and it made a loud ripping noise and the class cringed. My tongue hurt for the rest of the day.
  • Different teacher: You sound kind of Kermit-y
  • *Class reading sheet music without hearing what it was*
  • Teacher: Did anyone figure out what song this is? *Starts playing it on the piano*
  • Other students: Oh yeah!
  • Me: I have no idea what this song is...
  • Teacher: -insert song name- .....? The Beatles?
  • Me: Oh, I don't really like The Beatles.
  • [He got quite a mouthful from me, along with the head of the department and the head of student services. Justice.]
  • Teacher: Unless you officially take this up with the head of student services, to me, this is all potential bullshit. [My disabilities]
  • Me: *Having MAJOR panic attack* Please, please don't make me sing right now. I can not do it, I will take a 0 for the day, just please don't make me sing.
  • Teacher: Why?
  • Me: I wasn't there for the first half of the week so I don't feel comfortable, I didn't learn the song at school, I just tried to figure out myself.
  • Teacher: So you don't know the songs?
  • Me: I know them, but I don't think I know them well enough and I don't think I can do it.
  • Teacher: Ok you don't have to go first but you still have to sing. *walks away*
  • Me: *Still hyperventilating and crying in the back of the theatre*
  • Teacher: You can't just start crying every time I look at you! *She literally took me by the arm all the way to the counselors office and left*
  • Over the summer of 2013, I had brain surgery. I let the head of my department know that I was planning on being back at school in the fall. Multiple times. I told them at the end of the spring semester, and I told them over the summer twice via email. When I got to the department meeting, not only was I not listed on anyone's list for an advisor, I wasn't listed anywhere. My private voice teacher even replaced me. That was, I think, the most disappointing thing that happened to me.
  • -This class is based on individual interpretations of different songs and we sing them for the class. We also had to use a very expensive program for making sheet music called Finale, which I didn't own and I also didn't own a printer-
  • Me: Can I go to the library to print my music?
  • Teacher: You're supposed to do that before you get to class.
  • Me: I know, but I had some problems with Finale and I couldn't figure out how to fix something, I just need to fix one thing and print it. I just came from another class, I had no way of doing that. I'm sorry.
  • -Now, this is college, remember. If I don't have my shit together, it's all on me. I understood that, I was not on top of my game that day and I knew I was going to get a bad grade, but at least I was trying. I was about to give up-
  • Me: *I went to the Library to try to use the computer, but there were classes going on so I had to find a different computer upstairs. I finally get everything correct when I'm upstairs except one song out of a couple. I thought this was better than nothing. Unfortunately, it took the whole class period before I got back to the classroom downstairs.*
  • Teacher: What took you so long? You can't even sing your song now, class is over. I need to see you when everyone leaves, we'll go to my office. *goes to office* You are wasting everyone's time. It's disrespectful that you wasted my time, and you wasted the class's time.
  • -there was a long speech that followed but to be honest I didn't listen. That was when I decided to drop out. I literally gave my notice the next day. The relief that I never had to go back was lifted so much from my shoulders that I gave myself a CVS attack. I felt bad because I got a wonderful new private voice teacher and then told her I wouldn't be coming back. But if that wasn't the best thing I've done in my life.....well my brain surgery is probably more important but, you know what I mean.
  • The moral of the story: If something is making you unhappy, if you're being treated unfairly, if people are abusing you, leave. It will be the best decision of your life.

#branches #tree #texas #nature (at big spring)